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Saturday Night Live, Motivation Quotes

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Source: Saturday Night Live, Motivation

Speaker: Matt Foley

"I live in a van down by the river."

My name is Matt Foley and I am a motivational speaker. Now let's get started by letting me give you a little bit of a scenario of what my life is all about. First off, I am 35 years old, I am divorced, and I live in a van down by the river.

Context

This famous line is spoken by Matt Foley, motivational speaker, played by Chris Farley, on Saturday Night Live.

After a bag of then-illegal substances is found in their teenager's bedroom, a suburban family hires Matt Foley, motivational speaker, to talk some sense into their children.

He's 35-years-old, divorced, and he lives "in a van down by the river." Basically, he's the opposite of Tony Robbins. His de-motivational tactics involve telling the teens, "You're not going to amount to jack squat," sneering "La-dee-freaking-dah!" at their hopes for the future, and falling into a coffee table.

The moral of the story? Don't be like Matt Foley, or you, too, will be living in a van down by the river.

Where you've heard it

You've heard this if you've ever been subjected to a terrible motivational speaker—or if you're making fun of one.

Additional Notable References:

  • Chris Farley originally did the Matt Foley character as part of Second City in Chicago
  • The ESPN profile of baseball player Daniel Norris tells us that he lives "in a van down by the river." And he does.
  • There is a variety of apparel for you to accessorize with when you decide to leave your home, which is a van down by the river.

Pretentious Factor

If you were to drop this quote at a dinner party, would you get an in-unison "awww" or would everyone roll their eyes and never invite you back? Here it is, on a scale of 1-10.

Motivational speakers are often pretentious, but this one is way too sad (and too funny) to come close.